You would, wouldn't you, because you're dirty! Yes, it's a cheap trick to get attention, but what the hell. This weekend I did make sausages! By which I don't mean I bought some sausages and cooked them, no, I made them. Not on my own, I did have adult supervision, but sausages were made and I was there, helming the ship, like Captain Ahab, only making sausages instead of hunting the white whale. Which probably would have made for a boring book, but a happier time for Ahab's crew.
"But how?" You cry, tearing at your hair in incomprehension, "How?" Well, calm down and I'll tell you. Googling Brother picked up a wee hand-cranked, plastic mincer / pasta making thingie and brought it out to Casa MacBride: sausages for to make. It comes with a sort of funnel thing and if you speak nicely to your butcher he'll give you pig intestines to use as skins. Then all you need to do is mince your meat (not it a rude way) add your herbs and spices, then fill your pig innards. Couldn't be easier.
And they ended up looking like proper sausages too -- not like hand-made lumpy things. Tasted good too.
The best ones were the Pork, Leek and Cheese Sausages ala mode d' ici*. We'll be making those again, oh Lordy yes! Tastier than a tasty thing they were, but slightly less exotic than the steaks we had on the barbecue: it's a rusty old brick and metal thing that came with the house and my mother got the fire going with charcoal and some dry bits of stuff I dug out the garden ages ago. So our ribeyes were broccoli-smoked. It's a bit like oak-smoked only it doesn't come from a tree. Though I suppose if you were very small and had no concept of what broccoli actually looked like, then you might be convinced you'd stumbled into a wee green forest.
But you'd have to be pretty daft.
* I was going to post the recipe, but as I'm the only one who knows it, I can make my fortune by keeping it secret! Bwahahaha! I'll be like Colonel Sanders, and rich beyond the dreams of avarice! Soon there will be a Casa MacBride Sausage Restaurant on every street corner. I can see it now, the whole world worshiping my special cheesy sausage!