Right, that’s us all back to normal now – She Who Must Bring Home The Bacon* is off to work (not exactly skipping and making with the happy la-la’s, but there you go), the in-laws are back off to Darkest Fife, and I’m sitting in front of the computer typing rubbish at an unknown quantity of people. Hurrah!
I promised you a retrospective of 2005, but I lied. No retrospective for you, naughty people. Come on, who wants to read about it anyway? What? Well... no... shut up! ... leave me alone! OK, OK: Jesus...
The first draft of what will become DYING LIGHT is finished! And at last the world can see I’m much prettier than J Rickards ESQ and my shirt fits too.February:
I reveal my guilty secret – I am to become an bearded write-ist. And the cat gets bugs in her lugs.March:
A visit to Norway leads to fancy food, nice people and a mauling by Norwegian national radio and other assorted journalists. I go to London and learn how to manuipulate the media Bwahahahahaaaa...April:
I give up the day job (for a year) and almost get blinded by the cat, then it was the book launch! Lovely people from Ottakar’s ply me and a weirdo with wine and canapés. Only I don’t get any of the canapés.May:
Fighting like a bastard to drag up a new title for book 2 and scientists working in the shed at the bottom of our garden come up with a way to help those poor souls afflicted with naked chin syndrome.June:
BRAS! Lovely women’s bras! and then some rotten buggers make fun of me to win books from the naughty, evil Lynn. And and there are slugs in my garden.July:
HARROGATE! One of the high points of the year. And as if that wasn’t bounty enough, I also got two books from a pair of lovely ladies and a cat-sized quilt too!August:
Edinburgh International Book Festival and reprobates! Reprobates I tells ya! And then I go and spoil it all by making fun of some poor wee lad who ended up losing his virginity without thinking...September:
Fist instalment of Skeleton Bob is unleashed on an unsuspecting world, and She Who Musts laments another birthday. And James gets an agent! Hurrah!October:
I do my first solo event at Huntly and nobody throws anything. I don’t get a postcard from Italy and come up with one of the most stupid ideas I’ll have all year.November:
My one-man Beardy Wierdy tour hits Lanark and I meet a nice performance poet. Ahem... Goodling Brother Christopher and SIL Kim come up with a new protagonist for my second series of books. And Stuart goes drinking in London. Again. But doesn't win no Daggers. And Trace gets a book deal!December:
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