Ever wondered what goes on in a funeral parlour* at Christmas?
This is usually the part of the song where all musical talent and ability is put to one side so everyone can just belt it out: “five go-old riiiiings!” then feel dead chuffed with themselves as they rush to the finish line. Only we’re going the other way. Unless you’ve arrived at the end of this little experiment in daftness and are reading them all in reverse order.
* ‘Funeral’, not massage. We all know what goes on there. Especially John.