Catherine the Great

Big up and respect to my sister in law – Catherine, she of the raven hair and Dublin accent. She, my youngest brother Scott and their son Logan (from where I got the name) live in Dublin, where Catherine is a reflexologist and aromatherapist – and doing quite nicely thank you very much – and Scott is the head chef at the American embassy. But more than this, they are the vanguard in my evil plot to TAKE OVER THE WORLD. Bwahahahahahahahahaaaa…

Catherine has been going into bookshops and asking whether they’ve got any copies of Cold Granite in stock. In a loud voice. Partly to make sure as many people hear her asking for it as possible, and partly to be heard over Logan (3) singing ‘Jolene’ at the top of his voice (Which is a bit odd, given that his dad is an inveterate Red Hot Chilli Peppers fan and swears blind that they won’t have country and western music in the house.). Last time she asked about the book the man behind the counter told her that no, they didn’t have any copies – they hadn’t ordered any – and anyway, it wasn’t going to be out until the 3rd of May. “Aha,” says Catherine with a twinkle in her eye, “but I’ve heard it’s really good and getting great reviews…” and then off she goes to rummage round the shop. Then, just as they’re leaving – with Logan still giving it ‘I’m begging of you please don’t take my man’ at gas mark six – the man calls across the shop to her that he’s just ordered a heap of copies of the book. He’s been on the system and it really has been getting some great reviews: apparently this MacBride guy's the new Ian Rankin… At which point Catherine smiles and heads off to find another bookshop.

How cool is that?

Catherine totally rocks!